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THE CHOICE OF MOTHERHOOD






The certainty of procreation starts looming in our minds as we mature.



The thought of giving birth, grooming that child, teaching them what we know about life begins to set in and most people shy away from it or look for an escape route because, they do not feel ready to sacrifice their time while some do not just feel ready.




What people fail to realize about life is that, nothing prepares you for what the future brings, you just have to be ready, because it will catch you off guard, especially when you least expect it.



I had a friend that got pregnant out of wedlock, she called and explained the unexplainable to me, at that time I just wanted to know her decision, if she wanted to keep it or not.



Because she was unemployed and she was still in college.


And she said to me "Temi, I do not want to do anything to this baby, I'm keeping it".


I was stunned because I know the trials she would pass through would not be an easy one, then I asked why and she simply said because, she loves children and she does not care about what anybody would say to her because that is her decision, then I said "it's okay I cannot change your decision neither can I judge you".



Then I asked of the father and she said " he does not care what I do to the baby, he left me already".


Then I felt a strong attachment and concern at the same time for her, I almost wanted to help her carry the baby if I could.



So many women are making these choices everyday and it is still counting.


With or without the father, and one thing I learnt from my friend was the will she had in her, she never thought of running away from her problems or looking for someone to share it with her, she did not care and she stood her ground.




In marriages today, we see wives saying they will still stay for five years before they have a child, some less, some more, while some has already given birth to six children within seven years, you begin to wonder about the age gaps between her children.



Every woman has a choice on what she really wants for her life, and if it does not involves child bearing at all then I feel it is a wasted life.



What is the use of coming to this world without leaving anything but material things?


 No child to learn about the knowledge that you have.


No child to leave those properties for, your sweats and turmoil all for strangers?


Let us stop looking at children as distractions.



The way some women panic knowing that they are pregnant feels like the end of the world is coming, it is either you put him or her up for adoption or you keep them, it is simple as that.


I know, that as you are reading this article you might think it is easier said than done but it is better to make a decision than crying over spilt milk.



We all know what leads to pregnancy, if you did not want it in the first place, you should have protected yourself ferociously.




The only people that should panic and scurry around is the rape victims, incest victims.


At least, there are some parts of the world that accepts incest, so instead of crying and running around, why don't you clean your tears and think real deep about your situation and what you want to do about it.



If you are reading this article and you feel like i am seeing through you or this is exactly what you are going through.



I do not want you to panic just calm down, think real deep about what you want, inform anyone you feel like telling, talk about it with them, surround yourself with positive people.



Having a child is a beautiful thing, do not let circumstances or the present situation make you feel bad or the people around you, because some women would do anything to just have that baby.




And if you find yourself in this twist I understand you will brood but as a man, you are very much responsible as the person you impregnated.




So why don't you sit her down and talk about it, if you feel she is lying wait till you can do a DNA test to find out the truth and accept your fate.




It will save a lot of lives, do not be selfish, do not dodge your responsibility.



This article is my own way of talking to you my reader, in whatever situation you find yourself, fight and be strong.


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