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HOW TO SETTLE YOUR DIFFERENCES WITH YOUR PARTNER


When a relationship is just starting, you feel so happy with your lover.




He sees things the way you see it, he seems to know every reply to the questions you ask.


Love, so strong and beautiful that you feel like you should get married already.

The inception of the relationship was so amazing that you feel it would continue like that.


This period is where you feel the "tingles", you always want to see each other, you always want to chat them, you always want to call them because without them your day might turn out unproductive.



You get so tied to this person that you do not even ask yourself " is this how it will always be? ", " even if it changes will I still want to be with this person? ", " if I notice her flaws will I still want to be with her? ".


Believe me, sometimes we are the cause of the downfall of our relationship.

 When you were not patient enough to know if that person likes you or not.

 Or if what the person told you about him or her is true.


You just feel the tingle and you don't care again, you want to be with that person.


In weeks or months, when the tingle vanishes, you start seeing the real person you fell in love with.




" he doesn't listen to me talk again", you say to yourself. " she doesn't cook for me again,  she's always ordering food for us to eat and I'm going out of expenses every day".


" she doesn't talk to me again, all she says is "I'm fine" if I ask how she is.


Well if your relationship has gotten cold or sour all of a sudden, fret not, you will be needing this article.


Do not think that your partner is a stranger or that they are seeing someone else.


Everyone is different, no one can be like you, not even your siblings.





 We all have different culture, belief, tradition and perspective.



We are all unique in our ways.


Let's say before he listens to you chatter and chatter all day like a parrot about everyone in your family, and you move from a topic to another with no break repeatedly everytime you meet him, trust me he cannot like it, he is probably thinking of another thing as you talk on but he appears like he is listening.


And it will get to a time, he will not want to listen to anything you want to say because he's tired already, and you start wondering why he's stopped listening to you talk.


If you were the one in his shoes and he was the talkative, will you listen to yourself talk?.




I used to walk away whenever I get upset with my partner.


  I wouldn't say what got me angry, I will just take a walk and the reason for that was because I could say something stupid or irrational so it's best I leave but my partner wanted me to actually say it to his face and slap his face if that would make me calm, he didn't want me to leave angrily at any time.




I didn't realize that, and I did it everytime we had issues.

What I am trying to say is try to know your partner well.



Communicate with him.



I don't like the way you talk too much, it's deafening and frustrating, most times I pretend like I'm listening but I'm not.


I do not like the fact that you do not call me, I understand you don't like talking on the phone but I need you to adjust.


I know that I told you I was OK with you being a Christian but sometimes It feels odd.


Saying your mind will not hurt if you tried, it might hurt hearing some things you thought they liked but just take it like that and adjust.


Communication and negotiation will bring back the tingles.

Are you not tired of having the same issues on and on, you are not invincible, you need to be heard, you need to speak.

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